When one hears "self-care," one might imagine a yoga retreat or a luxurious spa day. While these activities are indeed forms of self-care, the term is much broader than many realize. It is the airplane safety rule many of us are familiar with. Put on your oxygen mask before assisting others. If you delay putting on your mask, you take the risk of running out of time to help others. Those who cannot help themselves cannot help others.
In the field of mental health, practitioners are taught that self-care practice is vital to professional and emotional stamina. With compassion fatigue or secondary trauma, healthcare providers listen to stories involving hardship and suffering. Due to the providers' deep empathy necessary for the profession, they suffer in turn. If the practitioners neglect their own mental health, they run the risk of losing the ability to help their patients. Many therapists have their own therapists!
Self-care is not only for healthcare providers, however. All beings have a need for self-care. According to Maslow's hierarchy of needs, physical and emotional needs need to be met before self-actualization or growth to occur. As a caregiver, you give everything to your child to help them succeed. You meet their physical and emotional needs at any cost to help them learn and develop into happy, successful people. So why not do the same for yourself? You need that oxygen mask too. In fact, without it, you will become unable to foster your child's happiness and success.
Don't have the time or money to go on a deluxe vacation? No problem. Self-care can be as simple as taking a bubble bath, painting your nails, listening to music from your youth, going for a run, or getting cozy with a good book or favorite TV show. Self-care practices such as these are enjoyable with family and friends but are also critical to do alone for you to let your guard down and focus on your needs only. Self-care could also be self-reflection with a journal or debriefing stressful events with loved ones. If you wish to be sociable, grab a hot cocoa with an old friend or schedule a talk therapy session. When you are in touch with your needs, you are more attuned to your child's. Make your mental health a priority. You deserve it, and so do your kids!
Written by Lauren Ribner